Saturday, 30 June 2012

Let's be honest

There are so many issues I think the youth of nowadays don't talk honestly about. But they are things that always bother me every now and again; issues concerning 'cheating on tests and exams', 'stealing from parents' and 'engaging in premarital sex'

On the issue of cheating on exams and tests; it's so rampant and sometimes people use euphemisms such as 'helping' to describe it (when two people are exchanging answers in the exam hall). Cheating as far as I'm concerned has become a scourge and is one of the things eating deep into the Nigerian educational system. People cheat at all stages-from primary school to undergrad and even masters level!! (I remember passing through a masters class while an exam was going on. The invigilator had his back turned to the class, while the two students in front were exchanging answers). Some parents encourage their children. We hear stories of parents buying 'expo' for their children for JAMB and SSCE exams. I remember in secondary school, a girl that was gisting with her mother who came to visit during visiting day. She was telling her mother how she was able to successfully cheat on a test and her mother was actually happy and they 'hi5ed'.

It's annoying that most people don't see anything wrong with it. Someone once said to justify his cheating that "Heaven helps those who helps themselves. God can't come down and help you pass your exams, so he gave you brain to think up ways to cheat"...SMH

In the university it's really bad and when one would have expected that most people in university should be grown up and confident in their abilities, what we see is sheer corruption going on and people cheating their way through school. The annoying part is when people actively cheat their way through school and end up with 2.1 and first class. It happens. There are people I know presently who are very good academically (at least that's what the results say), but every one knows part of their success lies in cheating. And then we wonder what kind of graduates we produce.

For me if something is wrong, it is wrong. No mincing words. I remember someone telling me I was a wicked person and I would never have friends in my class because I refuse to cheat during exam. And I was like duh! Since when did it matter to me what you felt or anyone else in this world for that matter. Abeg I have someone I would be accountable to one day. And besides I'm not looking to be a friend of the world.

Stealing from parents is another thing I find disturbing. I remember in secondary school when we were going on an excursion and we were asked to pay 20,000, one girl told her father it was 25,000. I was sad for her father and asked why she would ask for that amount. Her excuse was, her father has the money now, what's there if she lies about the real amount.

I remember one of our lecturers, who during one of his lectures digressed and told us we must really think our parents are stupid. He said he knows of students telling their parents they need money to buy funny things which they might term 'Osmosis' or 'pH'. It was hilarious and we all laughed but I knew in my mind he was not lying. Just recently when we started our different final year projects, I've overhead people talking about how they'd 'scope' and 'format' their parents and tell them they need 50k or 100k for their project, when they don't even need up to that. My own question is what is all this extra money used for. My conscience won't allow me do something like that and have these people never heard about the law of karma? The origin of everything is just greed.

Speaking out about how one feels about issues concerning premarital is most times greeted with insults from people and what not.

I remember some time ago when one of my friend's status on Facebook read:

        "Don't do it until you say 'I Do' "

and one of the comments under it read:

        "baba park well jor........lack of opportunity......lmao"

To say I was disgusted by that comment is an understatement.

My own opinion and based on my christian belief is premarital sex is wrong. No mincing words.

Even if a person does not believe it is wrong and decides to engage in premarital sex, the emotional, physical, medical and psychological effects of engaging in premarital sex, especially with multiple partners will not be nice on the person. It is always better to wait. I used to live in a world where I naively imagined in my mind that people of my age group, same faith tradition etc were not engaging in it. But when I went on IT in 400 level in a community pharmacy my eyes opened. The rate at which people were asking for 'Postinor 2' (emergency contraceptive) was higher than the rate at which they were asking for common paracetamol or vitamin C.

I'll never forget one lady, that came in complaining of vaginal itch and smell. In my mind I didn't want to judge her and imagine it was an STD, and as is proper in my profession, I told her to go for a lab test first so a vaginal swab could be taken etc, before anything can be done. She came back an hour later and told me she had gone to the lab and they asked her to come back in 2 days time for the result, but in the meantime she needed 2 Gold circle condoms and Postinor 2. My jaw dropped and I looked at her disbelievingly. I'm sure in her mind she suspected she was suffering from STD, but she still came back to ask for 'tools' so she could go get some more. I woulda expected her to go into a sober mode and wait for the test results.
Anyways who am I to judge..

This life is just the way it is.


  1. babes!!!! are so right. i had my principles while i was in school and i couldnt lower my standards for anybody.
    there was a time i thought that okay..even if you dont ask people, at least, help them or tell them a little. i cant really remember who it was that told me that.."same noni" loool...i rephrased that
    it was then i realized that i was still seen as guilty and so i just stopped teaching and wouldnt ask, no matter how much i don't know it. i mean apart from dignity, how can you pray to God to help you after you didnt bother seeking his face in the first place about the whole ordeal.
    and yet, we'll see people claiming to be intelligent due to what the RESULTS says..smh whereas its not true
    whoa!!!..i'm really surprised at the hi5 thing oooo!!!...imagine that!! later now, if the girl gets caught sometime in future, that same mother will blame who?!!!
    why do we like deceiving ourselves sha ehn??? too i will stand for that premarital sex thing By God's grace anyday anytime. its very sad that people who claim to be christians love dribbling their way through this topic when its very clear and point blank in the bible
    "fornicators and adulterers, God will judge."
    if only they knew the implication of the whole sex thing and stop believing in the Lie hollywood tells, sex is a soul tie- a special bonding meant for only a married couple and its a way of sharing, and not cutting yourself out.
    little do they know that sex fragments the soul and leaves part of them with each man or woman they sleep with hereby disrupting God's plan for your life
    The world will NEVER be right, and we should stop listening to ignorant people's theory about "what They think!" and listen to what God feels and wants
    yea...and that project thing too, at the time when i was in school, i had FRIEND WHO TOLD ME SHE PULLED that stunt with her father and its so sad
    its sad that we forget that what goes around will most definitely come around
    Even the bible says it that "God is not mocked, whatever a Man sows, He will reap.''
    nice post ay, no beating around the bush, no politics or diplomacy(LOL) and on point
    we need people like you in our generation. stay blessed babes
    hope you got my email?...i sent you one earlier

    1. Pheww!!...babes your long comments encourage me o :)!!. I'm glad you stuck to your principles.
      For me I don't care about the results anymore, because the more I worry about why others are doing better while they cheat when I actually put in all the effort, the more I enter into depression. I'm so much for developing my brain, doing my best and leaving the rest to God, because I have my eyes on the ultimate prize. This life sha. It's when we get into the real world these things start telling on people.

      It's really easy for people to get carried away by what the media portrays about sex o. Thing is all those movies make it look good, but they don't tell you the consequences it has on the individual, especially the contacting of STIs/STDs.

      Yeah, 'the world will never be right'. I've had to tell myself that everyday, because there was a time when I was much younger I'll be worrying about how wrong the world is and I'll get teary over it. Then reality sunk in and I realized I couldn't just change the world even if I was passionate to. Besides, I'm still a work in progress myself.

      Thanks so much for stopping by. Your comments are always appreciated :)

  2. The Cheating thing?? Its just so sad... In my class they had a "formation" for every exam, I won't say I NEVER did it oh.. Not carrying paper and stuff but asking... But after 200lvl or so I realised how wrong it was and stopped.

    You said your friend collected 5k extra??? He father is lucky... I know people that would collect 50k extra... But as my own father doesn't even have plenty plenty money I know how to cut my coat... I even use to pity the old man fah.. After paying huge amount for sch fees (went to a private uni) I wee just manage whatever he gives me..

    I'm so for abstinence anyday, anytime, anywhere.. Its just sad with the way the world is right now.. And like sugarspring said the world can never be right, so we have to just be the best we can be and raise our children right...

    P.s: *dancing* You removed that "verify before you comment" thingy :) *phew*

    1. It's really really sad...I'm so happy you stopped o.

      I actually know of people too, that collect more. Some people collect over 4 times the money meant for their school fees even though in a federal uni, it's not as expensive.

      Really appreciate your comment :)

      When I realized how annoying it felt to verify that I'm not a robot on other blogs I read, I sensed the one on my blog might be annoying others and so I removed it; especially as I know the verify thingy discourages me from commenting on some blogs especially when I'm browsing on my phone.


Feel free to leave a comment. You can't tell how much that encourages me :)